Suicide

Allah Ta’ala has given us bounties which are ours to use. But these bounties come with a price and certain conditions. We enjoy wealth and it belongs to us but on condition that we will have to answer on the Day of Judgment regarding how we earned that wealth and in which avenues we spent it.

Life, which is the essence of our existence, is also ours but entrusted to us as a test. The authority to remove that life belongs to Allah Ta’ala alone. A murderer for example can be executed, but only based on the guidelines set out by Allah Ta’ala and His Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam. No matter how tough life gets, we are not given the authority to terminate our own lives.

Wishing for death

Suicide is at best only a temporary fix for whatever problem we wish to escape. Beyond this world is an eternity with which we have to contend. Leave alone taking our life, the Hadith instructs us not to even ask for death, “None of you should wish for death, nor should he pray for it before its appointed time arrives. For once anyone dies his opportunity to do good deeds comes to an end. In actual fact, the life of a believer is never extended except that it brings goodness.” (Muslim)

The Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam was asked whose life was the best. He replied, “The one who has a long life and his deeds are good.” (Tirmidhi)

Someone commented to a pious person that death is a good thing. He replied, “Do not say that for an hour in your life in which you ask Allah Ta’ala for His forgiveness is better than the eternity of death.”

To wish for death due to the hardships of this world is not allowed. The exception is where one fears harm to his religious commitments. Maryam alaihas salaam said, when experiencing the birth of Prophet Eesa alaihis salaam, “How I wish I had died before this.” She said this fearing that she would not be able to handle the accusations of adultery that would follow. In the case of martyrdom for the sake of Allah Ta’ala one can aspire for death in that sense as well.

The Hadith advises us, “None you of you should ever wish for death due to any worldly harm that comes upon him. If he is really pressed and wants to pray, he should say, Oh Allah, allow me to live as long as life is better for me, and grant me death when death is better for me.” (Bukhari)

We are also warned, “Do not wish for death for the terror that follows it is immense.” (Ahmed)

Gravity of suicide

The Hadith sounds stern warnings regarding suicide. “Whoever deliberately throws himself off a mountain and commits suicide, he will be in the fire of Hell forever hurling himself off the mountain (and carrying out this act of suicide).” (Bukhari) The Hadith informs us that the same applies to other means of committing suicide such as drinking poison or using a weapon.

There was a person who was fighting valiantly with the Muslims in a battle, but the Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam proclaimed him to be a person who will be in Hell. He was found later to have committed suicide due to the extensive wounds he had received. (Bukhari)

A person who was wounded could not bear the pain, panicked and committed suicide. Allah Ta’ala says in a Hadith related by the Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam, “My slave has caused death to himself hurriedly. As a result I forbid Paradise for him.” (Bukhari)

What is the ruling regarding a Muslim who commits suicide?

Suicide is a major sin, but the person’s faith is still intact. A suicide is given all the rites of burial like any other Muslim, Janaza salaah is prayed for him and he is buried in a Muslim cemetery according to Imam Abu Hanifah rahimahullah. In fact, Shamsul Aimmah Halwani rahimahullah states that if he repents at the time he carried out the act leading to his suicide, that repentance will also be accepted.

If any family suffers such a tragedy, they need to be given support and made to understand that what has happened cannot be undone. Unduly dwelling on what caused the tragedy and repeatedly questioning what could have been done differently only opens the door to the devil to cause more misery and heartache. Make dua for the person who has committed suicide as you would for any sinful Muslim and give charity on his behalf, etc.

Suicide statistics are alarming:

1. Close to 800,000 people die due to suicide annually worldwide. Indications are that for every suicide, there are another 20 attempted suicides.
2. Suicide is the 10^th largest cause of death in the USA for all ages.
3. Suicide is the 2^nd largest cause of death for ages 15-24 worldwide.
4. In the last 45 years, suicide has increased by 65%.

Expressing emotions

The single biggest cause of suicide is depression. People who are dealing with suicidal thoughts or tendencies go through an immense internal struggle but it is a battle we rarely see on the surface. People feel ashamed to speak about it. The reality is that speaking about it and seeking help saves countless lives. The more we leave it out of the conversation the more people will unfortunately pay the ultimate price. While a person might not be fully cured, many have learnt how to cope with it successfully.

Islam teaches us that we are allowed to express deep emotion within the parameters of Shariah, and that people should be understanding when they witness this outpouring.

Mughith radhiallahu anhu was a slave who was married to Bareerah radhiallahu anha. When she was freed, she exercised her right to annul the marriage. Mughith radhiallahu anhu had such intense love for her that he could not bear being parted from her. He asked the Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam to intervene on his behalf. The Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam recounted this outpouring of emotion by Mughith when he said to Abbas radhiallahu anhu, “Are you not astonished at the love of Mughith for Bareerah, and the dislike of Bareerah for Mughith?” Ibn Abbas radhiallahu anhuma recalled how Mughith radhiallahu anhu would follow Bareerah radhiallahu anha, weeping with tears flowing into his beard. He was not told to man up and pull himself together in the emotional turmoil that he was experiencing, nor that he should keep his emotions bottled up. In fact, the community tried to find a resolution for him with the Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam interceding on his behalf.

What can a person who is feeling suicidal do?

1. Build optimism and try to change the paradigm. Do not view difficulties as always being a punishment or that it will be never ending.
2. You are a special creation of Allah Ta’ala. You enjoy a direct link to Him. You came into existence due to His will. Allah Ta’ala’s focus is on you, hence your existence. Value your existence and love yourself. Don’t depend on other people’s love for you.
3. Turn to the support structures within your family unit or friends or Ulama to help in combatting negative thoughts.
4. Support groups provide useful assistance for those with potential thoughts of suicide or who have attempted suicide.
5. Seek medical assistance from professionals. Don’t struggle with these feelings alone. Help is available especially with the greater awareness around the issue.
6. Identify positives that happen in your day and focus on them.

Some of the warning signs to look for:

1. Talking excessively about dying or wanting to die.
2. Talking about emptiness or no way out of problems.
3. Mentioning strong feelings of guilt or shame.
4. Talking about having no reason to live.
5. Giving away personal items and saying goodbye to family and friends.

What to do to help someone who is suicidal:

1. If someone has talked about committing suicide, don’t leave them alone. Contact professionals and get emergency help.
2. If it is not that immediate, talk to them about it. Mentioning suicide or discussing it is not going to push them over the edge. Talk privately without being judgmental. Be compassionate. Ask them directly if they are considering suicide.
3. Suggest they get professional help and give them the options especially a religious scholar.
4. Get the help of their loved ones if you are struggling to get through to them.

The D word

Depression worldwide affects 300 million people. Between 6-10% of the population will experience a depressive episode in a year. It is the 4^th leading cause of disability worldwide. There is every indication that the devil can be latching on to this as a tactic to actively create despair.

The devil hatches plans to make people become despondent according to the Noble Quran.

Ibn al Qayyim rahimahullah says that there is nothing more beloved to the devil than sadness in a believer. He goes on to say, “Don’t ruin your happiness with worry and your mind with pessimism. Don’t ruin your day by looking back at yesterday.”

Al Sa’dy rahimahullah says, “Life is already short. Don’t shorten it further with grief, worries and sadness.”

Here are six ways to prevent depression:

1. Don’t moan and complain about what Allah Ta’ala has decided. The Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam would pray, “Oh Allah, bless me with inner contentment regarding whatever You have decreed.” Studies have shown that over 40% of girls at the age of six to eight were unhappy with their figures! It is no longer a challenge of teens. Media exposure is the biggest culprit in this case.
2. Don’t live in the past. What’s done is over. Move forward. Living in the past and constantly thinking about what could have been is a means for the devil to infiltrate our minds and leads us to depression.
3. Don’t ever sin without repenting. Speak to Allah Ta’ala from your heart with regret and it will instantly erase the record of the sin.
4. Don’t hate people for what they have been given. The devil uses this as a means to ensnare people and mess up their lives. A villager who was 120 years old was asked about the secret to his long life. He replied, “I left out harboring jealousy for others, and my body remained healthy.”
5. Don’t turn yourself away from Allah Ta’ala. The Noble Quran tells us that if we forget Allah Ta’ala and His reckoning, then He will forget us on the Day of Judgment.